30 September 2012

Deployment Diary: Week 14

It's been a MONTH since I last updated this blog. So what's happened since then? Well, we are 1/3 of the way through this deployment! Fall has officially arrived in Germany. The temperature has dropped, the leaves are changing, the pumpkin festival in Ludwigsburg has opened, and Oktoberfest is in full force. Fall is probably my favorite time of the year and I must say I love it all-- The crispness in the air, pumpkin flavored everything, and appropriate weather for boots & scarves!

Honestly, the month of September flew by. Nothing terribly exciting happened. I didn't travel anywhere. I don't have any pictures to share and no real exciting news. Instead I thought I'd share what I've been trying to accomplish during this deployment... being healthy in all aspects of my life. 

Emotionally, Spiritually, and Physically

Emotionally: There are a number of things that have helped me keep sane during this deployment. I talk to my family. A LOT. They have been my greatest support system and talking to my parents on Skype for sometimes hours a day makes this deployment life feel a little more normal. I have a schedule. Consistency helps me feel a little more in control and makes the days go by faster. Trying to stay involved. I tend to be a little more reserved and a homebody, but I try to connect with the other wives here. They understand this crazy, awful process and are an amazing soundboard & make me feel a little less crazy.

Mostly I try to remember that such an extreme separation like this is emotional. Sadness, bitterness, anger, jealousy, loneliness, fear, calmness, excitement, or happiness. Whatever it is. It's all normal. And God-willing it won't last forever. I try to remember that and let myself have bad days. I don't have to be happy all the time. It's okay to be mad. It's okay to feel lonely. Ultimately I don't ever want to feel guilty about anything that I'm feeling and I think embracing that is a healthy outlook. 

Spiritually: I'm not going to lie. This element of living a healthy lifestyle has been on the back burner for quite a while. I think it's easier to see the visual side effects of poor physical and poor emotional health, but poor spiritual health can be much more detrimental. Since we've been in Germany (and some time before if I'm being completely honest) I've been pretty fat and lazy regarding my spiritual health. It's been a me, me, me kind of relationship. Always taking and never giving. So I've really been trying to turn that around. I've been consistent in our tithing. Earlier this month I started journaling again and began watching/listening to messages from the church we attended in GA: Crosspointe Church. I'm still looking for a consistent daily devotional and I'm definitely a work in progress.

I've been trying to let go and let God. A healthy spiritual life dips into a healthy emotional life and I know this. I just need to work on it. Knowing that God has a bigger plan has helped me have a better outlook on this deployment. If we are in the center of His will then this is the path He has chosen for us and we will be blessed. Although it may be hard and often overwhelming He is my greatest source of strength.  

Physically: This journey has been an exciting one for me.  I've been participating in a CrossFit style class at our gym on post since the middle of July and I am hooked. I think this video gives you the best description of what CrossFit is. Every day I go in it is a challenge. Every day it's something new. And if it's not a "new" workout I've done before it's still a challenge because I am competing against my previous time. Every day I'm surprised by what my body is able to do. I never thought I would be so into weightlifting, but after doing this style workouts I don't know if I'll ever go back. I grew up playing sports and once I got into college I missed it. I knew I still needed to be active, but running on a treadmill and using some machines DID NOT motivate me to go to the gym. CrossFit is motivating. I wish I had found CrossFit a long time ago. 

CrossFit has also changed the way I think about my body A LOT. Woman are way too obsessed with how much they weigh. Have you ever seen a picture comparing 5 lbs of fat and 5 lbs of muscleWant another example of how body weight is not a true example of being in-shape and healthy? I'm embracing the phrase "strong is the new skinny". Now I only weigh myself once a month. I've learned that how I look (is there more muscle tone? are my legs/arms more defined?) is more important that what numbers come up on a scale. My ultimate goal does not have a number involved -- it has a physical appearance.  Again I'm a work in progress but I'm loving this journey. 


  1. i love the new layout so much girl!

  2. I'm so happy that you're so far through it already! Hope the rest of it flies by just as quickly.

  3. Emma, Words can't describe how proud I am of you, and how impressed by your inner strength. Ross is not ordinary or average. Ross has a destiny. Ross is meant to touch many lives. Your devotion to each other is incredible. God will see you through it all. I had no idea when you were a little girl that you when you were 23 you would be in Europe waiting for your husband to come back for a war, but I also couldn't have know just how incredibly strong you would be. Your Dad and I love you so much. love, Mom